100 Good Things.

Here’s 100 good things in life off the top of my head. There’s an endless amount of good in the world.

1. Love.
2. The feeling where everything seems to come together.
3. Laughing so hard you cry and feel abs form.
4. Family and friends.
5. Travelling to a place you’ve wanted to go to for a long time.
6. Getting a great mark on a paper/assignment.
7. Painting.
8. Sculpting.
9. Drawing.
10. Art.
11. Music.
12. Pizza.
13. Trying new foods (and not having a bad reaction to it!)
14. Dancing until your feet hurt.
15. New make up.
16. New clothes.
17. When you love every song on an album.
18. A much-needed hug from a certain person.
19. Finding money in old clothes.
20. Learning a new skill.
21. Successfully riding your skateboard down the street for the first time.
22. Mountains.
23. Forests.
24. Beaches.
25. The first snowfall.
26. The first hot day after a long, cold winter.
27. 90s/2000s RnB.
28. Small parties.
29. Fuzzy socks.
30. Shopping sprees.
31. Comfy, worn-in sweaters.
32. Singing.
33. Dogs!
34. Cats!
35. Guinea pigs.
36. Bunnies.
37. In particular, corgi dogs.
38. And golden retrievers.
39. A new lipstick.
40. First drive in a new car.
41. Vacations.
42. Cruising.
43. Concerts.
44. When the fair comes into town.
45. Breakfast.
46. Waffles, especially.
47. Learning a new language.
48. Really good professors and teachers.
49. Watching your friends become successful.
50. Being successful.
51. Photos. Digital or hardcopy.
52. Art galleries and museums.
53. Cultures.
54. Rapping to a song perfectly.
55. Catching up with old friends and acquaintances.
56. Flowers.
57. Birds.
58. The ocean.
59. Flying.
60. Boating.
61. Rockets, and watching human mechanical ingenuity.
62. Children’s drawings and their silly antics.
63. Good wine.
64. Cheese!
65. Phone calls.
66. Thunderstorms.
67. Rain.
68. Christmas.
69. Halloween.
70. New Years.
71. Hot chocolate.
72. Road trips.
73. Smiling.
74. Happy eyes.
75. Giving gifts.
76. Receiving gifts.
77. The colours of fall.
78. Summer dresses.
79. Dancing with your mom.
80. Joking around with your dad.
81. Brunch with your grandparents.
82. Clichés.
83. Stars.
84. Musicals.
85. Manatees.
86. Getting a good sleep.
87. Sunrise.
88. Sunset.
89. The moon, and all her phases.
90. Walks in the park.
91. Kissing.
92. Sex.
93. Holding hands.
94. Ducks.
95. Hot dogs.
96. Finding your home.
97. Confidence.
98. Festivals.
99. Meeting new people.
100. Being 100% you.

Keep the list going if you have anymore to add!

Where’s the Destination for Destiny?

Destiny: des • ti • ny
Noun; the events that will necessarily happen to a person or thing in the future.

 

Recently, my parents gifted me with charcoal. Here’s my first charcoal piece– a carnation flower.

It’s been a while since I’ve posted something on here, hahaha.

Right after my final exams, I started working as a bartender in a country bar in Manitoba, and 12 hour shifts really exhaust you, so any free time I did have, I spent either sleeping or drawing (and watching Grey’s Anatomy which is so so good omg). However, since starting work, I’ve been thinking more and more about life pathways, and how little direction I’m having in my own life.

I’ve been looking at the world around me, wondering what I should do in life. I feel as if I don’t really have any skills or a niche that suits a career, like others do. Most of my life, I’ve felt untalented, one of those “jack-of-all-trades” that doesn’t really have a set of skills, or a prodigious talent. I know others around me have felt like that too. These kinds of thoughts leave a lot of us thinking we don’t have anywhere we quite belong.

On the other hand, I feel as if there’s too many careers or lifestyles that I want to try and live. I want to be an artist. A historian. An architect. A researcher. There’s endless possibilities that my decisions can take me too. Who knows? Maybe I can be all four of those careers at once.

Maybe we don’t know what we’ll be doing with our lives right when we want to know. I don’t think you ever get the answers right at the moment you want them. Fate doesn’t like to play games in such a way. Every person finds out at some point– some people find out early in their lives, some find their destinies late in their lifetimes. We’ll get the answers someday. Today just might be your someday.

 

Here’s a skull piece I did using charcoal as well.

PS: I recently made an Instagram account for my artworks. Mostly sketches and charcoal pieces right now, but I’ve also gotten into sculpture and sculpting small figurines so those may come up soon as well. You can follow my art account at: @artworkstuffs.

 

Welcome Home

Home
Noun; the place where one lives permanently, especially as a member of a family or household.
Adjective; relating to the place where one lives.

(A second magnolia flower I’ve done– symbolizing femininity and purity)

That amazing moment when you finish your exams, which also means: summer! Finishing the end of the school year! Freedom! Parties! Friends! Livin’ it up!! Time for art!!

Kidding. I’ll be working. Full time. Which isn’t too bad when you think about it, considering I’ll have some financial security in the fall. I mean, sure, parties and friends are fun too an it’s likely I may do a few things related to that, but I’m also okay with working to help pay off rent in the next year. Most importantly, I’ll also be able to make time to do art things, sculpting and sketching in particular. However, I’m just sorta sad that I’m in Winnipeg, MB for the summer (4 months, to be exact).

Okay despite the fact that Winnipeg is my birthplace, I just hate it. Everyone likes to tell me that Winnipeg is my home because I was born and partly raised there, but just because you’re born somewhere doesn’t necessarily make it home! To me, Vancouver has become my home; I love all the things about it, and I feel like Vancouver makes me more optimistic, and I’m often in happier moods. Even though a lot of people’s moods are disrupted by the gloom and rainy days of Vancouver, I’d still take that over -45 degrees Celsius. I’m pretty crabby in that kind of weather.

Yet another part of me wonders if Vancouver is truly my home. Maybe I have multiple, different kinds of homes. Ones that I haven’t been to yet, past homes from previous experiences. Maybe when I was a little five year old, Winnipeg was my home to me because it was all I really knew. Burnaby, BC became my home when I moved there when I was eight, having never wanted to leave. At one point in time, I lived in Calgary, AB, but have never truly considered that a home but rather a temporary placement. Who knows, maybe London, Paris, Florence or even Lima may be the place I call home sometime in my life. Maybe, home isn’t necessarily a physical place, but a person, suggested in the teen romance novel, Anna and the French Kiss by Stephanie Perkins (a great read if you’re a total sucker for little romance novels). Maybe it’s your mom, dad, boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife, grandpa, grandma, brother or sister.

Either way, I hope this summer, even the rest of this year, you may find your home. Be it Edinburgh, Scotland or your best friend down the road, I hope you find it. I hope the summer of 2017 is also something memorable, filled with joy and bouts of creativity.

 

Magnolia meaning:

Magnolia Flower Meaning

Seeking Lao Tong

Lao Tong (Mandarin)
Lit; “old same”; a form of eternal friendship between “heart sisters” – two women who are closer than husband and wife.

(A peony– they signify honour, beauty, wealth and riches, romance, and much more)

I’ve always wanted that tight-knit group of friends. You know, like in the movies? They’re your absolute best friends, and you couldn’t imagine your life without them; think How I Met Your Mother or Friends. I feel like we all want that, and some of us are even lucky enough to have such a group of people in their lives. We all want that group where unbelievable memories and stories spark from. The kind of group that quickly becomes a home to you.

I came to UBC all by myself. Having lived in Burnaby for 6 years as a kid meant that I did know of a handful of people coming to UBC, and a few others in different colleges, but the distance and the amount of time I was gone meant that I wasn’t as close anymore. Nothing bad, just that drifting occurred. It hurt a bit, seeing people in their own, isolated groups from high school or other backgrounds. Sometimes they’re nice and let you in, other times you’re just an outsider, trying to look in. Or the worst: being that third wheel, the one that’s forgotten, the one that’s not as close as the others.

During high school I thought I had been part of a tight-knit group, or the makings of one. Until, of course, drama would occur, or the endless girl-bashing and just repeated conversations over and over again. Not all of it was bad; we were all going into different paths, leading to different futures that likely meant leaving Winnipeg or staying. So needless to say, that group probably wasn’t going to make it (most of them don’t actually talk to each other now). After leaving them and going to Vancouver, you truly see who you’re actually friends with, and who you were only friends with because you saw them everyday of every week from September to June.

Personally, I always thought making friends was a tad difficult. You’re never sure of everything, and in university, some people are only there for school and work, nothing else. Sometimes, those people just use you for homework, which hurts. Other times, it can be hard to find people you just vibe with; the campus is so large here that you meet all different kinds of people, and it may take a while to find out who you truly connect with. But it’s bound to happen; maybe not in university, but sometime later in life, you’ll likely find people that make you realize life would be dull without them.

So far, I’ve learned that it’s definitely something you can’t hunt down. You can’t really make this a quest, you know? Kind of like love, it just happens. You just get out there, maybe you join a couple of clubs or something, and out of nowhere, your life is altered in a different way (without regrets, of course). All I can say is to get out there, do stuff, go to places. You might meet new people, you might not, you might just be alone for a little longer. However, like everything else in life, it’s worth giving it a shot! Have a good day 🙂

Meanings for a peony flower can be found here:
http://www.flowermeaning.com/peony-flower-meaning/

To Temul is To Live

Temul (Mongolian): te • mul 
Verb; signifies a sense of creativity and passion– to rush headlong, to be inspired, to have creative thoughts, and even take a flight of fancy.

(Lisianthus flower– expressing gratitude from a friend, traditional values, and lifelong bonds)

I always think the process, or the journey, is often more fun than the destination or the final project. The act of making something is more interesting to me. The journey of creating something truly shows someones creative spirit, and often shows their passion. When someone’s fabricating something, you can see parts of their soul coming out and into the open.

Of course, the final project is important, and is often the best part. Especially when it comes to art, you can proudly say, “hey! This was in my head! Now it’s tangible!!” and that’s pretty awesome. But there’s something about the process of creating something that’s magical to me. You literally see something in your mind, come to life. With sculpting, if you’re sculpting a person especially, it’s as if you’re giving birth… without having to deal with the excruciating pain or blood and all that (still a natural and beautiful process, but I’m a bit of a queasy person).

Art is just so cool. I’m forever grateful that humans formed the cognitive ability roughly 160’000 years ago to take the abstract and make it real. Looking at the murals in Lascaux Caves, France, astounds me, and I often wonder what our ancestors would think of our art now; not only do we sculpt and paint still, but manage to create digital forms of our thoughts. Art is inspiring, and I love how something as simple as a painting sends waves of emotions through us; sometimes empowering, sometimes anger, sometimes joy, even sadness.

I just have so much love for art. Art gives me a lot of feelings, haha. I hope something gives you fuel to create today; I hope something or someone inspires your creative vessel and sends you on a headstrong mission to pour out your soul. Have a great, and creative, day! 🙂

 

Lisianthus flower meaning:

Lisianthus Flower Meaning

 

The Bliss After an Exam

Bliss
Noun; perfect happiness; great joy. 

(A gardenia flower– symbolizing trust, hope, clarity, purity, and much more)

THAT FEEL WHEN YOU FINISH OFF A FINAL FOR A CLASS THAT YOU REALLY DIDN’T LIKE.

I mean, I still have three more final exams to go, but finishing off my geomorphology and landscape processes course? An inexplicable feeling of profound joy. After having done three midterms for it, studying for five days until 1AM all for a cumulative exam, I’m really happy that it’s now done and over with!!

I mean, I haven’t eaten a proper dinner in days, and my physical health probably isn’t the absolute best right now; plus, I think my vision is getting even worse than it already is… but I no longer have to take another geomorphology course!

Next week I have two back-to-back midterms– art history and biogeography –but for now, I’m going to relish in a couple hours of blissful sketching and just enjoy the fact that I’m not having to reread about volcanism or answer another blot of 200 practice review questions.

Perpetual good luck to those still fighting with finals; push through! Have a great day 🙂

Find out more about the meaning of gardenia flowers:

Gardenia Flower Meaning

Our Querencia

Querencia: que • ren • cia
Noun; a place from which one’s strength is drawn, where one feels at home; the place where you are your most authentic self.

(Study for finals? Nah. Camellia flower– symbolizing refinement, desire, and perfection)

I feel like we all have different versions of ourselves that we use in our everyday life. We’re the nice and responsible version of ourselves at work, school or around professionals. The goofy, chilled out, and loose version of ourself around our friends. Affectionate and loving self to our significant others. Some of us might even have those versions of our selves that we hope to be; they have their life together, actually go out and exercise, and are not sketching the evening away instead of studying for upcoming finals…

It’s sometimes hard being able to find those times where you can truly be authentic. I mean sure, we tell everyone that this is the real you and all that, but when it comes down to it, people act differently among other groups. Not in a bad way necessarily, but it’s just a normal thing; you don’t always act the exact same way you do with your significant other than with your grandparents. I find myself always trying to be authentic in every situation I’m in, no matter who is there, but sometimes you just have to make adjustments.

But sketching, doing any sort of art really, that’s where I’m most authentic. That’s where I feel most real, most like myself. I could do art for hours and truly hope it never ends. I mean, every situation does of course, but there’s this sensation that I hope doesn’t end. I remember I was doing a wax/paint work and was sitting cross-legged for (apparently) 6 hours. I didn’t even realize it until I tried to get up to eat; my legs were numb. But you get into such a mindset where you’re so focused but relaxed at the same time. I feel most happiest, pure, and natural in that state. Although my body might be tired, I feel stronger, like I can conquer whatever I want after finishing a work. Things are content when I just pick up a paintbrush or pencil. Doing art brings me a feeling of home, even if I’m away from my physical one. A mental home, I suppose.

Perhaps, though, these different versions we all have are just part of our authentic self. The real you. All these different selves are what make each and every one of us up. The one where we feel most at home with, our querencia, just so happens to be that one that takes us into a mental state of happiness, and where we can feel our strongest. Be authentic, because not everyone in the world is. Carve your own path, and just keep on being you. I hope you’ll get to embrace your most authentic self today, and hope that you have a great day 😀 cheers!!

 

Camellia flower meaning:

Camellia Flower Meaning

 

Writing About Writer’s Block

Writer’s Block: write• ters • block
Phrase; condition in which an author loses the ability to produce new work, or experiences a creative slowdown.

(Apparently, I can still attempt sketches but can’t write, haha. Here’s a marigold flower– they symbolize creativity, the loss of a loved one, and other sacred meanings in specific cultures, such as sacrificial use in cultures such as the Aztec and Hindu.)

I hate writer’s block!!!!!!!

Okay, sure this blog is about my everyday thoughts, but sometimes writing them out is difficult. Sometimes, the neat thoughts in my mind are only a sentence long, and can often be too difficult to expand on. Or, some of my thoughts are just too hard to actually fathom and string into words. Other thoughts are sometimes very personal, and the cyber-world doesn’t need to know them.

I remember as a kid I loved reading and writing stories. I’d even make little “books” and write in them (I would fold paper to make a “cover” and glue smaller, multiple papers inside and write in them, then draw a cover). I’d always start some story, get halfway through it, and then stop writing because of major writers block. Or, since I was a kid, I’d just start doing other stuff, get distracted, and forget about the story I was writing in the first place. Not much has changed as an 18-year-old amateur blogger. I’ll start writing posts, get through at least a hundred words, and then bam! A brick wall in my writing capabilities. Or, I’d finish writing a draft, reread it, and have no feeling towards it. I refuse to post stuff that I don’t have any feeling towards, because through my writing, you can probably tell that there’s no emotion through it. What’s the point of reading something if there’s no passion or emotion written behind it, you know?

Oh and titles. I literally hate doing titles. You always want something clever and witty, something to catch the reader’s attention, but honestly that can take time. Sometimes, the title is what starts the writing, but other times, it’s likely what ends your writing, at least for me. My English professor insisted on having clever titles for all our papers, and especially the research paper, but I’m pretty sure I spent a good half an hour trying to think up a title that was both intriguing and witty about the controversy on artificial intelligence. I don’t even remember what the title was, so it clearly wasn’t good enough if it didn’t linger with me.

So, having writers block on my own thoughts is a little funny. I can think up all of the material, but can barely get any of it down. I feel that as time goes on, it’ll get a little better. But I’m still new. Curses to you writer’s block, even though my writer’s block gave me this post’s content. Irony, such irony.
Cheers, have a great day ya’ll 🙂 (and I hope you don’t get writer’s block!)

Here’s a site on the meaning of marigold flowers:

Marigold Flower Meaning

Being Aplomb with Body & Mind Positivity

Aplomb: a • plomb
Noun; self-confidence or assurance, especially when in a demanding situation.

 

Sometimes, body and mind positivity is so difficult.

(A daffodil sketch– they symbolize inspiration, creativity, and even new beginnings)

You’re walking down the street, or you’re scrolling through Twitter or Instagram, even Facebook, and you see all these glamorous models, living this luxurious life that one can only dream about. Their faces are seemingly perfect, smiles all gleamy, and you can feel dull, boring, and plain. You can feel like you’re just average, nothing special, and your self-esteem takes this hit.

It might sound like a cliché, but even if you think you’re average, you’re definitely not. There is literally nobody like you. There might be a doppelgänger of you, but they’re never truly you. They don’t have the thoughts you have, they don’t wake up everyday in your body, making your own choices, having the same favourite things as you. You are truly unique, no matter what anyone tries to say. Your mind is yours, and only ever yours. Nobody can take that away from you. Mind-positivity sometimes goes unnoticed, but it’s truly important. Without a positive mind, looking at life in a positive light is nearly impossible. Things like body positivity are made more difficult to accept when you’re stuck in a negative mindset, and other mental disorders are harder to comply with. Having a more positive mind is a slow process, sometimes with little progress as time goes on, but it’s important. Although there is chaos in the world, thinking positively can help ease at least some small problems among communities, even globally. A little kindness does go a long way, even if we don’t always notice it.

Body positivity is also another struggle. Mind positivity and body positivity can go hand-in-hand; for some, as they become happier with their bodies, their minds also become a lot better in result. Sometimes, it’s the other way around. However, body positivity at the start is definitely difficult. From personal experience, I’ve been insecure about my body since I was maybe 12, like most girls at that time. It’s such a horrible feeling, and it’s disgusting that society still continues to degrade women and men in this day and age. At such a young age, we’re told that if our bodies don’t look a certain way, they’re ugly or distorted. At 12 years old, I was being told this through magazine implications and posters that were plastered all around me. I’m 18, and still struggle with thinking positively about my body, because things I’m told as a child still creep in the back of my mind. Nowadays, our outlooks are changing towards being positive about one’s body, to celebrate and embrace the biological temple we have been gifted. It’s a slow process, but I’m hopeful that future generations of pre-teens won’t have to hear they’re ugly for being born with the body they were given, like past generations have been.

Mind and body positivity is difficult, especially with social media around us all the time, telling us twenty different things at once and forcing us to re-evaulate our thoughts and outlooks. Sometimes it’s good; sometimes, social media helps us to become happier with ourselves, helping to create better thoughts in our heads. Other times, it takes a turn for the worst. But we’re stronger than that. Humanity has gone through glacial maximums, droughts, even world wars. Petty comments and degrading commercials are nothing against you, or anyone. You’re more than 140 characters, a hashtag or dumb commercial. Look yourself in the mirror, and remember the tribulations it took for your ancestors, even the archaic ones, to get you to this point. Your body is a temple of the past, the present, and whatever you make of it in the future. Positivity begins with each one of us, and hopefully, you can help pass it on, to the ones around you, and through future generations. Have a great day, and spread some cheer around today 🙂

 

PS: if you’re reading this and do have some body-posi struggles, here’s a little list of things I either do or say when I’m not sure about how I look/am insecure with my body (I hope they can help, or at least inspire!:

1. Go to a store and find something cute, but unsure that you’d ever wear. You know those clothes that you see and go “omg that’d be so cute… but I could never wear that.” if it’s in your budget, buy it, go home and wear it. And the entire time, remember why you thought it was cute. Tell yourself you look cute. Tell yourself that you’re modelling the shirt because you’re gorgeous and that’s why.
2. Don’t girl/guy-bash. Bashing on others based on sexual activity and appearance reflects your own state. So what if the girl has sex a lot? So what if he’s wearing a tie-dye pair of shorts? Those are their choices. Your choices reflect how you might look at yourself, and of course others.
3. Every. Single. Day. Look at yourself in the mirror and compliment yourself. You bought those shoes ’cause you liked them right? Say that. “I love these shoes because they’re pretty/cute/urban, etc” Don’t backtrack on your compliments either. You said it, and you can’t take it back. Own up to it.
4. Give positive-pep talks. Hype yourself up. Add music if necessary.
5. Own yourself; you belong to nobody but yourself. Your choices are yours. You went bra-less because you wanted too. Wear make-up because you want shine, you’re a 10/10 with or without makeup. You decided to get a tattoo because it’s your body and you can. Let nobody tear you down.
6. SELFIES. Ignore all the Baby-Boomers and Gen X’s. They can yell at our narcissism all they want– if King Louis XIV of France could get a 3m x 2m  self-portrait of himself with fur blankets and gold in the background, you can take a quick selfie in the sun.
7. Empower others. If you see a girl in a store who puts herself down because of an outfit, hype her up! Empowering others helps to empower yourself, and others will start to do it too. Hype up your girlfriend/boyfriend as they’re getting ready to go out.

 

Vorfreude for the Summer

Vorfreude (German): for • froy • duh
Noun; the joyful, intense anticipation that comes from imagining future pleasures.

(A random potted tree sketch I did during the weekend; maybe it’s a cherry blossom tree? I don’t really know.)

As the last week of classes starts, I’m actually kind of sad. I really do love university. I love learning, and just the campus itself. Having to go out to work in Manitoba for four months honestly sucks so much. Upside: I get to spend as much time with my boyfriend. Downside: I’m in Manitoba. You win some, you lose some.

But already, I’m so excited for next year. I’m so ecstatic to go full force into arts courses, focusing all my energy into things I love, and of course, more sketching. I can’t wait to start taking more history courses, and all the future events and things to join next year. I felt still so confined and shy this year, and I’m hoping to open up more during my time at UBC. Join more clubs, and try to tick more things off my own bucket list, at least, I hope I can.

With the essence of summer rapidly approaching, I can’t help but be excited for that too. There’s just something about the future and all the things yet to come. This summer, I know I’ll be doing and learning new things, living in a different place for the next four months, and being with family for a while too. Thinking about it now, I guess learning how to bartend is pretty exciting, and also something great to tell people at parties. You know, show some bartending tricks. I don’t know about you, but I think that could be a great way to make friends. I could also be totally wrong.

And art! I have so many sketch ideas, even painting ideas all ready to burst from my hands and mind. I’m thrilled to start getting truly back into sketching, and soon, I’ll have more time (and space!) to start doing other possible works. I love doing artworks that take a long time to accomplish. More effort is put into it, and can be reflected. Sure, smashing a couple mediums together, or splattering paint across a canvas (although, Jackson Pollock’s art often took weeks, as he did spend good time on his work) can be quick and easy, even show effort. However, sometimes, the art that takes the longest really shows commitment and concentration. I have four months of full time work, but there’s always spaces in between, so who knows what might be created!

I hope you’re just as excited for your foreseeable future, even if you have absolutely no direction with it. You can always make plans now, or live impulsively, going with the flow and approaching the future opportunities as they come to you. With a happy mindset, and a full-force attitude, it’s likely bound to be great. Hopefully, this summer of 2017 is memorable for all of us! Have a great day 🙂

 

Here’s a site about the abstract artist, Jackson Pollock, if you’re interested in tidbits of his life. It debunks a few myths, ones started from his biographical movie, and tells you some interesting facts about the late artist:
http://www.biography.com/news/jackson-pollock-biography-facts